I spoke your name while writing it. And as usual I had a shy smile on my face where I scratch my forehead looking down, so that nobody notices it. Now only you know this secret.
Twenty three years of your life will soon be completed. And I should congratulate you for your phenomenal achievements so far. But as they say “Rest if you must, but don’t you Quit“. Never quit on life. More milestones are waiting to be achieved. May you become the Chief of Indian Army one day. And when you do, re-read this letter because someone someday prayed for it.
24 June 2014.
The date still hangs around , weighing me down in your love.
I get up with it every morning, I sleep on it every night. It has stayed . It has stayed in the rose kept in my diary. It has stayed in the soiled ticket of Regal. Follows me everywhere. And when I shut my eyes to it, it transforms into a million colors bursting in front of me.
The Smile, Yellow, Sunshine. The Rose, Red, Love. The Tiger, White, Happiness.The Coffee, Brown, Hunger. The Movie, Green, Delight. The Lift, Grey, Passion. The Metro, Black, Sorrow.
The date still hangs around , weighing me down in your love. The date you returned to your first love, the Army. Time has killed it but it stays alive in me, in the dried rose, in the soiled ticket. I will wait.
My head’s under water, but I am breathing fine.
I miss you in a simple, desperate, human way.
And did I say – I love you.
It is a quiet June night , way past midnight.It is all darkness under a thin glowing veil cast by twinkling stars in a clear, dense sky. I am sitting near a window overlooking the park. The curtain can barely cover the yellow light straining through the huge sodium light on the road, shedding a pale luminous dust on the things in the room.It feels as if its neither day nor night, just the intermingling . And here I am , smiling while writing this curious anecdote to you. Is this what we will become years later- your ending and my beginning fused into one another. As if there is no I or you.So intimate that my hand on your chest is your hand. So intimate that when I fall asleep , it is your eyes that close. Continue reading